BARAK VIPERSBANE EARNS HIS NAME as told by Baroness Kate O'Guinn of An Tir
You know Folks with all the fussing and fuming going on,
I think it might be time to tell a story. If only to
remind us why we prevail through all the decomposing of the body politic."
"So I'll tell you all the story of Barak VipersBane or The King That Really Did Save the Village."
"Years ago there was a mighty King, Barak was his
name and Lao his gracious Queen. A festival
was held for 10 days in honor of the Christian St. Hildegard and Their Majesties attended for all of the days."
"And so it was, one fine summer morning, the women
of the village were felting and carding and spinning,
the men had moved 100 yards up the road to put on their armour and practice martial skills, our children
were playing in the dust of the path, as children are wont."
An innocent voice called up to his mother, "Mama, look
at the snake."
Every Mama looked up and horrified, realized that "the snake" was a rattlesnake. The children were
safely whisked out of the area of danger and being proper medieval women we looked to our men
to protect us. (Being intelligent modern women----Hey, *they* had on armour).
So we called to our husbands, brothers, friends,
"Help!", we called, "Rattlesnake!, Help, snake!".
They didn't respond to our calls, indeed we called many times.
The viper slithered into the wild lilac thicket in front of a tent while we called out.
Our men, hearing our call, wondered who among them was
named Snake and what did the women
want with the fighter named Snake. It took a bit before the true situation became clear to them.
(It is said fighters get hit in the head, a lot). Once our need was clear, the ruckus of fighters were
immediately at our side.
The snake was hiding in the lilac thicket, and there was
discussion to decide what was next,
safe move would be. But one fighter, who had apparently been hit on the head more often than
the rest, took his pole arm and beat about the bush.
Causing the Viper to head directly for our Good King's foot.
Barak, with all the skill of arms that made him King,
with Dame Fortune smiling upon him, called
upon the Sacred Kopros, and thus yelling, "Holy Shit", stove in the Viper's Head, with one blow.
Being a loyal retainer I offered to skin and cook
the Viper so our King might make a meal of him.
But alas, even a King's courage can fail, and King Barak ate beef that night.
Finishing her cider Baroness Kate orders another and a round for her friends.
BLACK FINN'S RANSOM as told by Baroness
Kate O'Guinn of An Tir
"Pull up your chairs children, and fill up your ginger beer cups, Auntie Kate will tell a story. Dizzy, you come sit right here.
I'll tell you a story about when I was a Princess."
It was Egil's Tourney and the weather was----well,
it was Egily, wet and cold. This always causes an odd reaction
in folks that choose to stay throughout the weekend. They seem to have *more* fun.
So it was with one of the Princess's Guard, who was also
the Prince's Squire. Indeed Squire Finn was having such a good
time we couldn't find _him_. But we did hear tales of this Black Finnigan guy and His Raiders, who were going from tent to tent,
raiding for beer, pretty girls, or your most _worthless_ possession. He would not be satisfied with anything less.
He had collected amazing booty, ciggarette butts, plastic spoons, used duct tape, a penny, but he'd also managed to abduct,
totally in accordance with her will, a fair maiden.
So this scurvy Raider brought Our fair subject to
the tent of her Prince and Princess (us) and demanded her ransom---much
and alcohol, or they threatened they were going to take her to all the parties in camp that night.
Feeling the need to "rescue" our subject, but not willing
to empty our coffers (coolers) of the ransom, we sent another loyal minion
behind our tent and into our Squire Finnigan's cooler, to collect the ransom.
Black Finn was pleased that the ransom was paid in his favorite
brew, indeed he came back several times for more ransom
. Good thing he kept hiding it back in his his cooler, where we could reach it......
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